Dear Facebook,

Listen, I think we need to talk...

I'm not going to say it's me because it's not, it's you. I don't even know you anymore. We're just not communicating like we used to. I think I've done all that I can at this point, there just doesn't seem to be any getting through to you. You say one thing and you mean another, it's like you don't even care about me any more, it's like you've completely given up on this relationship. Well fine. I'm beating you to the punch, we're done.

Okay look, there's someone else. I'm sorry. He's got everything I could ever want from a social-networking internet community. He understands me like you never did, like you never could. His name is Buzz. I love him. I know this is hard for you to hear but I gave you every opportunity I could for you to fix this. The letters, the late nights, the hours I've put into us. Buzz makes me feel special. He knows what I need. He knows how to make my waste of time productive which is more than I could ever say for you or your efforts!

I know this hurts. We've had some good times. You've done a lot for me and I'll never forget the love that we shared. But I still can't get over these last couple months, how you turned your back on me and Birthday Sex. How you left all of our fans in a black hole on Christmas day. What would my mother have said if she were alive to see that? I can't trust you, I can't take the chance on getting hurt like that again. You're no different than Friendster or MySpace, or any of those others who I've gone through before you.

I'll never be able to erase these last six years, only deactivate them. Goodbye Facebook.

Always,
Moan of Arc