L8 Nite 4play

So after you finish your group masturbation class with the boyz downstairs (X2C, Relentless, Pressure, Satisfaktion, & Pipelayer DUH) you mite wanna take some time to clean up between the bushes and I don't mean getting the merkins soapy. No, I mean open your arms and give your opossum the hug she needs. If you want some help figuring out how to properly love your pet, here's some useful tips from our friend Pearl, Rosie O'Donnell's ex-wife. It's just nicer when your rodent's nails are as bangin as mommie's!

L8 Nite Romance

Dear Boyz- Study this to become men.
Dear Gurlz- Follow-up.
Dear BoyGurlz- 5-way simultaneous orgasms, JEALOUS?!

FULL MAD MOON MEN

GET YR WITCH ON, HEATHENS!

tonite's full moon in the sign of aquarius is a reminder that we should howl towards the sky to thank the mother goddess, hold close our inner witch, and watch the season premiere of mad men to remember the days of good fashion, stiff drinks all day, closeted homosexuals, smoking indoors, and housewives shooting guns.

Humyn Facsionz

The Mickey 2 Our Minnie

it's like a macarena mating dance for the kidz who got kicked out of the mickey mouse club. learn it, bleeders!

B4 They Were Fame

ok yeah so what if the leotard was tite, it's not our fault if jesus loves us.

now that lindsays back in the slammer

we thought it only necessary to pay homage to her jam-packed-with-hits career!

*official mug shot july 19, 2010, year of our lord*

exhibit A: kidzstardumb

The Parent Trap, 1998 (RIP Natasha Richardson)

exhibit B: teenstardumb

Mean Girls, 2004

exhibit C: popstardumb

chk out the dance sequence @ 2:40!!!

then she was a lesbian with this dyke

(thank goddess!)

then she processed that break-up like a lesbian with that other dyke

...wait did she do NEthing else?

JK!!!!!!!

linzee -- we know yr like totes tha most famous & we looooove yr spray tan (for serious) plus those leggings you hawk make our fattie thighs look so lean 'n clean. annnnd like ohmygod you are SO FUNNY when you do things like internet date or shoot murder porns and baby you shud put all 15 of us to work cuz we could clean that house for you like whoa and all youd hafta give us is a role in yr linda lovelace biopic cuz lord knows we gots tha deepest throats. miss you on twitter, baby! see you in 2 weeks! dinah & ali say hiiiiiiiiii(Gh)!

ps. gud job on the courthouse glitterbomb, tina colada & bloody mary!

ill say it again...

...And I Love the Shoes

That's our baby! Look at him go!

Knock It Off!

Enough is enough. We see you, we know you're out there, and we're gonna get you.

First you rip off our Pearl Harbor show with that Videofone thing, then you get at our feathered headdresses and now NOW the bodily meat charts! Can you celebrities please cool off and stop stealing our stuff! I mean you Beyonce, you Gaga, you Kelis, and now even you Pamela!

I mean, we're totes flattered but we wouldn't mind a credit here or there...