BaileyBoo
Guru
BaileyBoo has no memories before the age of 18. She founded [H]OM[o]/e after a brief affair with an FBI agent in Canada, in search of a place where humans can live nameless, genderless, and without googlisms. She opens her arms and her vaginas to boygirls across the world who are looking to escape real lyfe through concentrated living and united realnessisms.
WesBoo
Scream Room
Orphaned at the age of two, WesBoo mastered the art of screaming in order to be moved to the penthouse at the orphanage. It wasn’t long before he honed his acute sense of anger management and began corralling emotions like John Wayne corralled horses (hence the cowboy demeanor). Don’t be fooled by his extreme tranquility though, there is a dark fiery passion buried deep within his somber gaze; we just hope he doesn’t unleash the demons on the newbies Hopkins style.
LexieBoo
Henna Specialist
Originally purchased as the neighbor’s Swedish mail order bride, LexieBoo has studied Henna preparation and design with some of the finest butchers and gutter punk tattoo artists of Central Europe. Her method is entirely organic and calorie-free. After leaving the neighbor’s with a secured green card, she worked at the mall one summer as a specialty soap salesperson hence her sparkling smile approach to marking your skin.
AliciaBoo
Guided Meditation
Blinded by a losing battle with pop rocks and a Chihuahua in early childhood, AliciaBoo turned to mediation to redefine her senses. Her lyfe work is dedicated to the destruction of technology hoping that eventually everyone in the universe will reject sight in solidarity of her blindness. Her seemingly sadist trials are demonstrated in her past experiments with broken glass labyrinths, rusted razor labyrinths, and most recently cat feces string labyrinths. Don’t be fooled by her height, AliciaBoo is in her late 70s and has preserved her looks solely by sleeping 19 to 22 hours every day.
GeorgioBoo
Labyrinth
Like the white décor or the inflamed vaginas, GeorgioBoo is a staple in lyfe at [H]OM[o]/e. It is not known when GeorgioBoo came to [H]OM[o]/e or how or why. We do not know if he is literate and no one has ever seen him use the bathroom however he lives happily, simply, and zenly as a tool in our sacred goal of universal enlitenmemt.
VivaBoo
Sounds of the Universe
The longest member of the [H]OM[o]/e tribe, VivaBoo began studying the sounds of the universe during puberty at the zoo with a single drum and a whole lot of gyrating. She has interviewed over 10,000 animals in her lifetime, channeling the psychic powers of the future they each posses; sometimes even going as far as eating the animals in her trancelike state. Her grasp on animal language extends beyond human understanding. She has been known to lend her body to a spirit animal from time to time for supreme voyages of enlitenment. She has not left the [H]OM[o]/e grounds since the early 90s.
LiaBoo
Pee Auras
Raised in a polygamous/Mormon home, LiaBoo has a psychic sense of the warmth that lies inside you. Just by smelling the afterdrip of your urination, she can tell you exactly how many sexual partners you have had, the length of your father’s scrotum, and at what age your children will die. Trained by her six late mothers, LiaBoo is the only known living Pee Aura specialist in North America. Be aware, the grace and ease at which LiaBoo defines aura colours and lyfe stages has brought many to tears and a few to instant death.
AnnaBoo
Detox
AnnaBoo began her lyfe with [H]OM[o]/e after retiring as the lyfe coach of Beyonce, the former [H]OM[o]/e household drug dealer. Through her own experimentation and research performed of hundreds of “volunteers”, AnnaBoo has discovered the secrets to instant detox. With a particular knack for balancing herbal supplements with bodily waste, she is the face of the fite against Bulimia and Fatfobia in [H]OM[o]/e. She is also responsible for keeping all the boos in perfect shape.
DixieBoo
Non-Invasive Plastic Surgery & Fat Whisperer
Trained in the most expensive exclusive resort communities in Germany, Italy, Denmark, Bulgaria, & France (please excuse the confusing accent) DixieBoo flies into [H]OM[o]/e weekly to wrap and whip all of our members. You will not see techniques like this successfully practiced anywhere in the universe. Not for the faint of heart, DixieBoo can move, restore, transform, and kill any unwanted deformity known to [wo]man. (If rash or bleeding occurs please contact your doctor immediately.)
GritzyBoo
Kegel Korner
A native New Yorker, GritzyBoo knows the inner workings of vaginas like no woman has ever known vaginas in herstory. Originally interested in breast-feeding then clitoral reconstruction, her vaginal blessings are the Saint Anthony of the zen community. A pleasure to listen to, GritzyBoo will open doors in your undersides that your didn’t even know were locked and we have buckets on deck just in case. Private sessions available upon request for all genderless peoples.
ErinBoo
Partner Tantric Yoga
ErinBoo found [H]OM[o]/e after deciding to leave her profitable street-walking career in Detroit. Her tantric skills extend beyond the yogi hoopla and are, as you can tell by her colourful descriptions and outer dialogue, deeply influenced by her real lyfe experience as a 1st rate hooker. She is particularly concerned with the relationship between the shakra of your anus and the shakra of your thumbs.
FreakBoo
Steam Room Dude
FreakBoo never officially took the oath of [H]OM[o]/e enlitenmemt however through his valiant efforts of breaking into the community naked on several occasions over the course of a year, he is allowed to partake in the lyfe at [H]OM[o]/e so long as no one is touched. His commitment is outwardly displayed in his determination to literally grow his own vagina.
JulieBoo
Baby & Cat Yoga
Preceding the trends splotching the newspapers today, JulieBoo is the epitome of caregiver. Her tough love techniques are littered with hugs and kisses. After the accidental murder of her own family, JulieBoo turned to borrowing friends’ families in order to develop her controversial yoga routines. But our research proves that a coma is just another word for a much needed nap!
BuzzBoo
Massage Circle/Cool Down
What better way to indulge in zen than with a good old-fashioned massage? BuzzBoo proudly visits over two hundred spas every year to observe progressive massage on non-progressive people to bring up-and-coming pleasure t o the progressives at [H]OM[o]/e. Touching is an essential part of connection here at [H[OM[o]/e and BuzzBoo has carefully coordinated our reactions and interactions with hit chants from the past five generation. BuzzBoo’s side project is endorsed by GarageBand.
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